Those Tree Climbin' Fish

 Ugh, dyslexia is so annoying.  Here I am struggling to read and take notes on A Brief History of The Druids by Peter Berresford Ellis and Gods and Myths of Northern Europe by H.R. Ellis Davidson, thinking that one's for the Indo-European book review and the other is for the ethnic study, only to realize that they're both for the same category.

Well, I know which one I'm picking for the ethnic study book review, the one that I'm actually enjoying, the second one.

Now to see if I can actually read the first one without the pressure.  Those celtic names and words significantly slowed my dyslexic ass down.  Despite my dyslexia, I'm actually a fast reader--now I may not comprehend everything I'm reading, but that would be true if I was a slow reader too.  Dyslexia's a pain in the brain.  

However, I've been studying Norse paganism and history since about 2020, so I'm far more familiar with it than Druidry.  

These book reviews have been difficult for me.  The first book I tried was In Search of Indo-Europeans by J.P. Mallory and boy that books made me realize that although I love language and history, I do no love language history.  This dyslexic is definitely not a fan.  I ended up skimming that book.

The second book I tried was The Myth of Matriarchal Prehistory which I eventually learned that the author is a TERF.  Had I known that beforehand, I would'n've bought the book.  After fact checking, it went into the garbage.  The author wasn't a TERF when she wrote the book, but as another Dedicant said, you can see the "seeds of bigotry".  

I understand the whys of reading books by bigots, or with bigoted ideology--know your enemy so you can have educated arguments with them.  As well as to make sure that you don't repeat history, like I get it.  Debating and arguing are not my strong points.  I don't care to read stuff by problematic authors.  I'll leave that for people who have those talents and skills and patience and self discipline.  I would rather put my time towards something else.  I have strengths in other areas that I'd rather feed and grow in.

Which leaves me with two books in this category.  Both are difficult to get a hold of, they are expensive, and they are big.  I wish the Dedicant Path program would update their booklists.  There's gotta be newer books, written better with updated research and evidence, friendlier to folks like me with learning disabilities and other neurodivergencies, and lack of resources.  It's outdated and unfair.  Some of the books on the list are on audio, which is fantastic, some may also come in other formats, but sometimes I need the layperson, dumbed down versions in order to actually understand what I'm reading and hearing.  

Sometimes I don't feel smart enough to be a Druid, because of these scholarly books.  Surely, there's an idiot's guide to In Search of the Indo-Europeans, or one of those cliff note books that they have for university textbooks, right?  Something that someone like me, who is pretty smart but has learning disabilities, can substitute and still pass the DP.  The DP is making me feel dumb and I know I'm not.  It's just unfair.  Yall need to update and offer substitutions/accommodations, especially since the Dedicant Path is so important in order to take other training programs.  Feels like gatekeeping, which I know isn't the intention.  It's just really frustrating, and it's bringing up bad school memories of not feeling good/smart enough--things that I have to work through, obviously.

ADF isn't a college/school, and many of its members have jobs outside of it, so time, money, and effort to make accommodations for neurodivergent people is limited  There's a lot more going on in ADF than just it's training programs.  I also gotta wonder how many neurodivergent people quit or didn't try because there are very little accommodations?  I dunno.

Well, at least I don't have to read A Brief History for a book review anymore.  Don't know what I'm going to do about the Indo-European book category, though.  Save that one for last, figure it out then.  

I love reading, but I hate writing book reviews.  I'd rather take a test.

- Dedicant & Hearth Keeper Foxlyn