A Kindof Intro

There we go, a fresh new blog for my druidry adventures.  I already have a lot on my main blog, Book of Mirrors, and just felt like giving--at least my Dedicant Path stuff it's own space.  That blog has been "Book of Mirrors" since day one of blogspot for me, back in 2011.  Other have come and gone, such as my old wordpress From the Mud, which was about healing, a weight loss and belly dance blog (Dancing Nymph), and another.  I do still having my pagan parenting blog, although it's not as active as BOM.  Book of Mirrors has stayed constant and active.  I read and research a lot, and I write a lot too.  I don't share quite as much as I used to, but I still write.  BOM as of late has become a bit of a catch-all.  I wanted my druid stuff to be separate.  There may still be some overlap, but that happens.

Introduction time, is it?  I'm not great at intros, so bear with me.  I'm Kristy, my spiritual name is Foxlyn Wren, or Fox for short.  I'm married with kids.  I am polyam and pansexual.  She/Her pronouns.  Neurodivergent.  I used to be a professional photographer, but since 2020-21, I've got my own psychic and spiritual business, called Hearth Fox Oracle.  I've been an ADF member since July 2023.

I've been a polytheist since I was about 8-years-old and a witch since 10-11-years-old.  First in my family in a long time, thanks to my love of mythology books and a Wicca book that my parents thought was a fantasy book.  I wasn't a Wiccan for very long, though, I quit that path in mid or high school.  I have cPTSD, so parts of my childhood are blurry--can't quite keep track of timelines.

I am eclectic, mostly deity and ancestors guided/taught.  Over the years I've been Wiccan, Shamanic Witch, Spirit Worker, Moon Witch, Domestic Witch, Hearth Witch, a Hellenic Polytheist with splashes of Roman and Minoan Paganism, an Astral Witch, and other titles and labels.  

Now at nearly 40 I'm an Oracle/Seer, a Torch Bearer, a Hearth Keeper (not related to ADF), a Seidkona (think Norse spirit worker witch), and a Druid (Hellenic and Norse Hearth Cultures).  I am also a Priestess within my own homebrewed family tradition--trained and initiated by my deities.  But I hope to become an ADF Clergy in a few years.  I also hope to be able to focus more on funerary rites and grief work.  I'm actually working towards Death Doula training.

I am psychic with various abilities.  One of my favorite abilities is consensual possession/trance-possession.  And no I definitely don't consider possession and channeling to be that same.  Like the difference between Evocation and INvocation--some tend to use those interchangeably, or they confused the two.  I also enjoy automatic writing/typing. One of my favorite experiences when reading for someone, once Odin came through--as a channel not a full possession--I went blind in my right eye.  When He left, I regained sight.  That was such a cool experience.

How did I arrive at ADF?  I think it might have been around 2014-15.  I craved local pagan community and friendship, and heard about a public ritual that Three Cranes Grove was hosting.  So I went...and kept attending their events.  I was nervous about joining ADF because I wasn't a druid, although I was curious about it.  Plus I had a couple of bad experiences with groups having that Our Way or the Highway attitude (which later I'd learn that ADF doesn't have).  

It wasn't until my deities initiated me as a Priestess in 2022, that I started considering joining ADF again.  I had the god training, but I needed that human training, too.  I needed to learn how to work with humans.  I wanted to help my human community, not just the deity and spirit communities.  I wanted to earn my ordination, not pay $25 for it from a website.  So I went on a search, and almost every path led me to ADF (or Cherry Hill).  But I had to figure out if Druidry was a path that I wanted to follow.  I researched and soul searched, and sought advice.  I really love ADF's liturgy.  I love the Three Cranes Grove community.  Their rites inspired my public rituals, too.  I felt ease when I adopted some of the liturgy.  There were a lot of pros.  

In July 2023, after talking to Freyja and Baba Yaga, I joined ADF and jumped into the Dedicant Path, eager to learn and progress.  Soon after, I became a Friend of the Virtual Fire Proto-Grove and in October I became a Friend of Three Cranes, too.  I've met a lot of cool, friendly, and knowledgeable people, some that I'm proud of call friends and learn from, as well.  The ADF community has been really wonderful so far.  I also feel very safe, in comparison to others groups that I've been a member of over the years.

I experienced a lot of loss last fall, and it's also been nice to just sit back and be a student, instead of having lead, teach, and host everything (don't get me wrong, I love doing those things, too, but what's needed now is rest and healing).  This is an established, large community, with many leaders, instead of just one--they also have elections and the clergy get background checks and stuff--they seem to really care about protecting their community.  There's actual accountability, and checks and balances.  Is it perfect?  No, but I feel safer and more welcomed.  Every community has their issues, but some are less toxic than others.  Some aren't at all.  There have been a couple of problematic people here and there, but group mods seem to take care of them pretty quick.  At the same time, why pay the money to troll a community?  ADF has a firm stance against bigotry.  I dunno, some people are strange.

I'm odd and I have a very difficult time fitting in.  I've almost always got one foot here and one in the Other.  I can hear and see entities almost all the time--incorporeal chitter chatter.  I may also be autistic which has it's own host of things that make interacting with people difficult (I can't mask to save my life)...on top of the weird spiritual shit.  Learning how to deal with my social issues and how to have better control of the spiritual ones is exhausting.  But so far, within ADF, I may not be the smartest or scholarly, but I also don't feel like a freak that needs to be controlled by others or that I'm too much for people, either.  I don't feel like I need to dim my light to make others more comfortable.  I can be my authentic self, and so far I haven't been shamed for it.

Plus it's great to be in a community where a lot of people are just as, if not more passionate about spirituality and actual pagan history as I am.

Due to past experiences and my often making excuses for others red flags (because I'm afraid to misjudge people, as people often do to me), I am taking it slow.  Easing my way in, while also trying to remember how social skills work, learning from my past mistakes, keeping things in mind, etc.  Despite my psychic abilities, I tend to be too trusting of people sometimes.  I'll see red flags or my guides will warn me, but then I'll end up gaslighting myself and getting hurt later.  These are harsh lessons that I've been learning over the last couple of years.

I just realized that this post was supposed to be an intro...told ya I'm not very good at these.

Well, I guess, that's where I'm at with ADF right now.  Three Cranes Grove is having their equinox rite tomorrow and due to being sick, I'll be attending online.  Like usual.  Feels like I'm illin or allergin every High Day.  I'll also be attending Virtual Grove's weekly ritual, and performing my own with my kids.

I'm 8-9 months in the Dedicant Path and only have one essay done, although I've heard that it can take anywhere from 2-5 years to complete.  Grief's really slowed things down for me, but that happens.  I'm in no rush.  I'm grateful for Virtual Grove's DP discussion group, too.  If I haven't been working on assignments, at least I've been going to most of those meetings.  Venting, learning, supporting each other.  

Well, I'm going to work on this new blog some more.  Type at yall next time.

- Oracle Foxlyn Wren